Chaos Awards: Vol 23

Greetings One and Everyone!

Hello Ladies, Gentleman and wrestling fans! I am The Nemesis here with another installment of the Chaos Awards!

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to see TNA this week due to my stream giving out. But rest assured I will be making to making a mockery of TNA and their Creative Team next week!

Let’s get this party started!

Onto Business!

Best Match – Chris Jericho vs. Goldust
There is something said for this match, especially when the World Champion goes on twitter and says that a ring veteran such as Goldust is in the best shape of his life and praised him on their match on Superstars.
I believe that this is a first for me. Actually commenting on a show on Superstars as the Best Match of the week. But this really deserves it.
Goldust vs. Jericho was a brilliant match and I honestly believe that from that match, Goldust might just get a tiny push in the direction of a championship.
At least I hope he does. It was a fantastic match. The best match on Superstars so far.

Worst Match – Ezekiel Jackson vs. Jimmy Wang Yang (Smackdown)
Wow. Thank you so much WWE.
Just proved to me exactly why every single Cruiserweight from the last 7 years is jumping ship to TNA. Because if they don’t, they automatically become the jobbers of this generation… which is crap in my opinion. If you bring back the Cruiserweight Championship, the credibility of the WWE goes up by several notches!
Yes, Ezekiel Jackson is big. Yes, Ezekiel Jackson is strong and yes, Ezekiel Jackson is a dominating force… BUT if you are going to put him in the ring with someone that can actually give him a run for his money but still make it look like they are jobbing to him… The perfect candidate for Ezekiel Jackson. Festus. Speaking of which…
WHERE IS FESTUS?!?

Best Performer – Edge
I don’t think Edge can get any higher than what he is right now.
Although they are pushing Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker more, Edge vs. Jericho is going to tear the roof off of Wrestlemania. I truly believe that.
Edge is getting the huge push and he’s a face. I never thought I’d see the words Edge, push and face in the same sentence without seeing Cena or Undertaker in that same sentence.
Edge is really at the pinnacle of his career. Although he is a 9 time World Champion, I don’t think he could be best suited anywhere else than being a WWE performer. He’s charisma is only equaled by his on screen ego and I really respect and admire Edge for what he’s gone through.

Worst Performer – Jack Swagger
Jack has to have done something to be in a “rivalry” with Santino. The All-American-American-American-American-American-American-American-American must be glad that he is going to Wrestlemania and NOT wrestling Santino Marella.
Still, I don’t know what he is doing in Money in the Bank. This time last year, he was ECW Champion and looking to extend his record after beating Finlay at No Way Out. Then, he was cut from a Wrestlemania match because McMahon didn’t like his in ring work.
Now, I’m surprised that he’s actually at Wrestlemania this year. If he wins Money in the Bank I WILL be surprised and applaud the WWE for doing something different. Not saying that it is the right thing, but it will be different and it will be what I want to see.

Best Moment – Cena vs. Batista Confrontation
He’s 6’5” and 310 pounds. At first, I had no reason to like the security. But then the promo started and it became a classic.
If I saw Batista down the street in a really pissed off mood, I’d make sure that I got out of there really quickly to be at least 20 miles away before he took one step towards me. If Batista had security and he’s pissed off, I’d be scared to be the security guards!
The rest of the promo was sweet! Classic Face Cena and classic Heel Batista, this is what promos should be like in wrestling.
This promo with Batista and Cena has now made me want to see this match at Wrestlemania. I finally have a reason apart from the rematch from Summerslam 2008.
Thank heavens for the Creative Team (if it was them) for FINALLY doing something right!

Worst Moment – Cheech and Chong
Two men… who are famous for smoking cannabis… on a PG RATED PROGRAM… having “effects” of being high.
Well *edited* done creative team.
A PG rated show with guys talking about “magic cheerios” while introducing the divas… Sorry. You just completely threw up on the PG rating. Although you did do one thing right. You made me make up my decision. I will NEVER EVER end up like those two. Ever.
Lucky Charms reference with Hornswoggle… DO NOT GET ME STARTED ON THAT!
Why does the WWE INSIST that any of the last few guest hosts have ANYTHING to do with wrestling? Someone please answer me that because I would really like to know.
Seth Green – fantastic. Shaq – fantastic. What about the rest?
Make Shane McMahon GM and get it over with!

Questions: What will WWE have to do to restore it’s credibility to the fans?
What does the WWE have to do to bring back the fans that they have lost in the last few years?
Almost the same question, but I’ve got these in two questions into one.
Here is the list I have come up with:
- Restore the Cruiserweight Championship
- Get rid of the PG rating
- Fire The Great Khali
- Fire Santino Marella if he doesn’t have a match or a gimmick change in the next 6 months
- Fire Hornswoggle
- Make at least 4 new main event stars in the next 8 months
- Bring back blood (somewhat)
- Get rid of the gimmick PPVs
- Restore the Hardcore Championship
- Create more Tag Teams
- Split the Tag Team Championships
- Bring back the kick ass music for PPV events (I don’t mean Skillet. I mean Godsmack, Saliva… they got it right with Fozzy for once)
- Scrap the guest hosts and get a GM
OR
- Get guest hosts who actually KNOW wrestling and are passionate about the wrestling business
- Induct The Rock into the Hall of Fame
- Induct Chris Benoit into the Hall of Fame
- Mention the passing of the superstars who worked with the WWE at any one point in time (They remembered Jack Brisco who never worked for the WWE yet they didn’t remember Eddie “Umaga” Fatu)

Do these things and maybe the WWE will get their old fans back. The fans that they have lost in the last few years might actually enjoy the wrestling product slightly more.

Chaotic Top 20
After a pathetic week in the voting department *evil stare to everyone*…
Angle’s lead has been cut by a small amount.
Beth is back in the top 20 after a strong week and Mr. Anderson climbs within reach the top 10.

**Mr. Anderson is ahead of Triple H from a count back

Vanilla Coke Championship Wrestling!
VCCW Presents Vanilla’d to Death!
Grape Soda and Orange Cordial do battle to see who will be selected for the next generation of VCCW stars.
The Grudge match on the century comes to an end this Sunday! Diet Coke vs. Coke Zero inside a Glass bottle dome! A battle for the ages that cannot be missed!
And in the Main Event…The Nemesis defends his VCCW World Championship against the Evil Unstoppable Monster himself Diet Pepsi!
VCCW Presents Vanilla’d to Death – Live on PPV!
Contact your local satellite broadcaster to be laughed at.

The Bottle Won't Open Rant
John Morrison and R-Truth are the #1 contenders for the Unified WWE Tag Team Championships at Wrestlemania.
I am okay with this, but the thing that annoys me is that they beat two tag teams that have been together for more than a year to earn that spot.
Cryme Tyme and Hart Dynasty are still there you know. I would still like to have see The Miz and Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme or The Miz and Big Show vs. Hart Dynasty at Wrestlemania.
If you are going to have TAG TEAM champions… please put the tag team belts on a tag team that is a CREDIBLE tag team.
I can’t go to TNA this time because of Hernandez and Morgan… but look at the number of tag teams that you have in TNA that have been together for longer than 6 months.
Beer Money Inc., Motor City Machine Guns, Lethal Consequences, British Invasion, The Beautiful People, The Nasty Boys, Team 3D. If I’ve missed any team I apologize, but that is what I came up with on the top of my head. Now name those from the WWE…
Hart Dynasty, Legacy, Cryme Tyme, Bella Twins, MVP & Mark Henry… Are there any others? DX isn’t a tag team anymore. I think that is everyone who has been together for more than 6 months.
So if you are going to put the titles on a tag team, make it a tag team who knows each other and is a credible tag team. Yes TNA has done it before… but it’s worked before. In the WWE, they are throwing top guys together because “they haven’t got anything else for them… so we might as well put them in a tag team.”
Yet again… Creative Team. Pathetic.

Thus concludes another fine episode of the Chaos Awards.
I hope you can all tune in next week!

I’m The Nemesis, you've been a reader.