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 Chaos Awards: Vol 9

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The Nemesis
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Posts : 38
Join date : 2009-12-16
Age : 31
Location : Australia

PostSubject: Chaos Awards: Vol 9   Fri Dec 18, 2009 1:20 pm

Greetings One and All!
The Best Awards on Planet Earth! Apart from... Oscars, Grammies, Nobel Prize Award… okay so I’m not the best. But this maybe the best to plenty of you and I commend you for tuning in yet again!

The Nemesis is here ready to enlighten you with… err… enlighten you with… um… Targa Files? Whatever they are.

I missed a lot of TNA this week due to my service provider crashing on Saturday. Yay! So I only have limited TNA but hope I don’t disappoint!

Anyway, much to talk about this week so lets get it started!

Best Match – CM Punk, Randy Orton & Legacy vs. John Cena, DX & Undertaker
As much as this match was declared “The Best 8 man tag in the history of Smackdown” they could’ve done more, but I won’t get into that side of it.
10 years of Smackdown. I’m glad that they had these stars for the 8 man tag. BUT I do wish that Jericho and Big Show were in the Main Event. They were there from the start and probably deserved a whole lot better than just the promo.
I believe though, Shawn Michaels is the only “veteran” in that match who has never been on the Smackdown roster. But that doesn’t matter.
It was a really good ending to a very special Smackdown. Very fitting to have Undertaker pick up the pin with a Tombstone to Orton.

Worst Match – Kevin Nash vs. Dr. Stevie
What the (censored)? I wasted a good glass of Vanilla Coke on this match because I hurled it at the TV.
The match itself was good, but 3 minutes long? *Hears an echo of Eric Bischoff’s “3 minutes” *
Why use Steven Richards as a (censored) Jobber? I know he’s had neck surgery and he still sounds like his voice box has recently been in a (censored) blender, but he still has the credible talent to be at least a mid carder.
Unless Nash is trying to have a couple of matches break because of the matches he’s had with Foley, I can’t explain why they would do this.

Best Performers of WWE – Legacy
I’m so glad that Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes have stepped their game up. This rivalry with DX has really pushed them up to a level that has really made me see them as major contenders in the WWE.
Before I thought that they may have been just Orton’s (censored) and they were never going to get a decent push. Now, my thoughts have changed.
Legacy have put on a good showing in the last two PPV’s. Now it’s only a matter of time before Rhodes or DiBiase is holding gold around their waists.
I would actually like to see Rhodes vs. DiBiase at some stage next year. I think it will be a brilliant match. Almost like Orton vs. Batista with the Evolution split in 2004.

Best Performer of TNA – Hernandez
This guy could, or even should be, TNA World Champion. He’s been awesome in the last few months and why he’s only got a World Title shot from cashing in his briefcase is beyond me.
I don’t know why TNA is basically turning it into a “Fatal Four Way” type rivalry with World Elite, Hernandez, Main Event Mafia and Matt Morgan all going at it in three separate rivalries.
Hernandez has the ability and the charisma to be the #1 guy in TNA. Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez for the #1 contendership would be a sweet match. One of those matches that you would just look at and want to see again.

To start all of life’s pleasures, all you need in a tall glass of Vanilla Coke. Down all of your troubles with a carbonated drink that is so alluring, you cannot stop at one.
Life in a glass, Vanilla Coke.


Worst Performer of WWE – Abraham Washington
That’s it. He’s got my Worst Performer of the Year in the bag. There is such a HUGE gap between him and 2nd last (currently held by Tony Atlas) that it’s just become a “How much is he going to lose by” contest.
Even Ziggler and Morrison couldn’t make that segment better. MORRISON! (censored) hell. You cannot have the ‘Friday Night Delight’ on that show and still make it suck. That means that there is something VERY wrong with that segment or the host of that segment.
Zack Ryder at least has a look. At least Zack Ryder (censored) wrestles!
For (censored) sake. Get him… off WWE TV… for good.
There is nothing, I repeat, NOTHING!! good with that segment at all.

Worst Performer of TNA – TNA Creative Team
What in the (censored) has gotten into the TNA Creative Writers?
Foley turned on Abyss… because Abyss stole his barb wire bat. What the (censored)?
Seriously, what the hell is TNA trying to achieve? Are they turning all of their (censored) top stars into Heels or something?
And what is the (censored) point of Main Event Mafia vs. World Elite. Two HEEL stables going at it… who in the (censored) are you going to cheer for?
TNA has got some good ideas… that isn’t one of them.

Best Promo – Jericho, Big Show & Michael Cole
I spat Vanilla Coke all over my living room floor when I saw Jericho’s face. That was so brilliantly done.
Jericho and Big Show making a valid point when coming into the party with Jericho doing the talking as always.
Then Cole coughing his lungs up before ejecting the contents of his stomach all over Jericho’s shoes.
Jericho turning bright red and Big Show leaning over and up chucking himself, man it couldn’t have been better done.
I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard while watching WWE television.

Worst Promo – Al Sharpton on Raw
I know that I’m Australian and I don’t know a whole lot about Rev. Al Sharpton, but I do know that the majority of the WWE Universe didn’t want him there.
I understand that the WWE is committed to helping out the children of the WWE Universe. But honestly… they could’ve done it a better way.
Not only the opening part of Raw with Al, MVP and Mark Henry. But almost the entire time he was on camera, I could just sense the people get up and walking to the stands to purchase some more refreshments or the people watching at home getting up to go to the fridge.
He wasn’t the worst host that they’ve had on Raw, but I hope that next weeks is better.

Introducing new Vanilla Coke GUMBALLS! One bite and you’ll be hit with that Vanilla Flavour that only a vanilla coke drinker can enjoy! Every bubble you blow, when it explodes there is a hint of vanilla freshness in the air that will make you want to keep blowing bubbles all day!
The Gumball that never loses its flavour. Vanilla Coke Gumballs.
C’mon! Buy them!


Best Move/Change in WWE – Bringing Vickie Guerrero back
How else can you solidify someone’s heel status than having Vickie as their manager?
We haven’t even heard of this guy Eric Escobar, or whatever his name is, but we already don’t like him because he has Vickie as his manager.
As much as we don’t want Vickie to be back, I think that she’s going to be a big part of Smackdown because of Eddie’s Legacy.

Worst Move/Change in WWE – Continuing to put the Abraham Washington Show on the air
Now I tuned into ECW for the first time in about a month. Within 43 seconds I realized why I had stopped watching the (censored) brand.
I have never heard so much heat since Randy Orton DDT’d Stephanie. Not only for Abraham but for Tony Atlas as well.
After 3 minutes and Dolph Ziggler coming out, I couldn’t stand another (censored) second and turned it off. Not because of Dolph but because of the quick back and forth between Abraham and Tony.
Man PLEASE get rid of him. I can see absolutely no sense of why that is still on the air and why they continue to think the fans are going to be won over by that (censored). Please get him off the air!

Top 10 Performers
1. AJ Styles
2. Shawn Michaels
3. John Morrison
4. Batista
5. Matt Morgan
6. Triple H
7. Ted DiBiase
8. John Cena
9. Randy Orton
10. Bobby Lashley

Last Weeks Top Ten
1. AJ Styles
2. John Morrison
3. Shawn Michaels
4. Matt Morgan
5. Batista
6. CM Punk
7. Ted DiBiase
8. Kurt Angle
9. Triple H
10. Suicide

Top 10 Moments
1. Eddie Guerrero Tribute Montage.
2. The Rock’s speech.
3. 8-Man Tag Match.
4. Hell in a Cell comes early to Orton.
5. Chavo ‘saving’ Hornswoggle.
6. Main Event Mafia vs. World Elite Brawl.
7. Kofi getting back his US Title.
8. 5-way Ladder Match on Impact.
9. Ending of TNA.
10. Build up of Legacy/DX on Raw.

Vanilla Coke – Greatest Moments!
This 45-minute long DVD contains some of the greatest vanilla coke advertisements and campaigns in its entire history.
Featuring your favourite stars! The Nemesis, Dennis Rodman, Britney Spe- wait… Britney’s on this? Seriously? How is that so?
It’s a picture of here in her Holiday house holding a can. Okay then, we’ll take that.
Vanilla Coke – Greatest Moments! Available from all your Vanilla Coke distributors.


Person/People who I miss this week – Chris Benoit
It’s the 10th Anniversary of Smackdown. I can’t believe that they didn’t have at least something on Benoit.
He was such a brilliant wrestler. I don’t care about what people say he did. What he did INSIDE the ring is the way I choose to remember him.
I was watching No Mercy 2003 a few days ago. He was in a match against A-Train. There was a mess up in the match where Benoit was dropped by A-Train head first onto a Steel Chair. Benoit just shook it off, got up and finished the match with no problem. 5 months later, he became World Champion.
I truly miss Benoit for the dedication and perseverance that he showed every time he stepped into the ring. People can judge him for what happened on the day his life ended, but I choose to remember him for the legacy that he has left inside the ring.


Hell in a Cell Predictions!

Drew McIntyre vs. R-Truth
Winner: Drew McIntyre

Mickie James vs. Alicia Fox
Divas Championship
Winner: Mickie James

The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger
United States Title
Winner: The Miz

John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler
Intercontinental Championship
Winner: Dolph Ziggler

Big Show & Chris Jericho vs. Batista & Rey Mysterio
Unified Tag Team Championship
Winners: Batista & Rey Mysterio

DX vs. Legacy
Hell in a Cell
Winners: DX

CM Punk vs. Undertaker
World Heavyweight Championship
Hell in a Cell
Winner: Undertaker

John Cena vs. Randy Orton
WWE Championship
Hell in a Cell
Winner: John Cena

Also, as of this weeks PPV, Hell in a Cell, I am going to scrap my monthly awards and just put the polls in my normal weekly awards to avoid confusion.
Every PPV now there will be 6 awards with 7 Monthly Awards that you can all vote for!
PPV:
Best Wrestler
Worst Wrestler
Best Match
Worst Match
Best Weapon Shot
”Cichael Mole Award” (Biggest Screw Up of the Night)

Monthlies (For this time only…this is for BOTH TNA and WWE):
Wrestler of the Month
Best Match of the Month
Worst Match of the Month
Next Change you’d like to see in WWE
Next Change you’d like to see in TNA
Most Overrated Star of the Month
Most Underrated Star of the Month
Best Rivalry
Worst Rivalry

Good luck to all who dwell inside Hell in a Cell. May there be an endless supply of Vanilla Coke related weapons and refreshments for all!

I’m The Nemesis, you’ve been a reader.
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